I'd like to go to the seaside...

"Every cloud has it's silver lining". "Every time one door closes another one opens". "Maybe it's a blessing in disguise".

If I had a penny for every time someone (including myself) said this to me before Christmas, I'd be like, a fiver up.

Okay, not quite a fiver.

But my point is, in the past I probably would have just chalked this up as sentimental waffle that people say for encouragement.

In the last three months though, I have come to see some truth in it.

I consider myself incredibly lucky to have had a bit of a wake up call, forcing me to see the life I'd let myself slip into.  I've realised how easy it is to just "let things happen", and stay in a situation because it's more comfortable than rocking a boat.  I'm sure we all do it sometimes - sticking with a job, friend, partner or some other bad habit when we know in our heart that it isn't what we want, simply because it's simpler to keep to what we know than to shake things up, or allow ourselves to be shaken up by something else.  I can see now that I had totally cocooned myself into a secure little nest, mostly under the excuse that it "makes sense".  I had a nice little house, a nice little routine, and a nice little set of bills and chores to keep on top of - which is a sign of growing up and living life, isn't it?

Hm.  Maybe, maybe not.

As I say, I've been fortunate and was given the shake-up that I didn't even think I needed.  Why was I pushing my dreams into a corner?  Why was I jeopardising my relationship?  Why was I repeatedly forking out a ton of money each month for "grown up" things?  Because change seemed unnecessary, and scary, and like it could lead to disappointment, failure or regret.

Well, yes. Change might make you seem poorer, or lonelier, or physically exhausted in the short term, but that isn't the same thing as failure and regret.  Ending something allows a new thing to start.  Leaving something means you get to arrive somewhere else.  It's very rare that someone hands you the opportunity for change on a plate, so if you see something you want then don't feel selfish - grab it.  In six months you could be waking up next to someone you can't wait to see, springing out of bed to get to a job you're crazy about or ending the day somewhere you can truly feel at home.

Am I scared that this might all fall apart, and be an expensive, upsetting, complicated mess?  Actually, not so much; something in my gut is telling me it's "right".  And even if it does, so what?  I'm happy that I've taken the chance to re-evaluate what I've been doing, and am taking the risk to move towards something that will (hopefully) be a lot more satisfying.  One door might be about to click shut, but the next one - at least the door to our flat in Brighton - is about to open.

2014.

About a year ago I wrote a post recapping 2013, so I thought it apt that, even if I haven't blogged anything for the last 6 months, I should at least have a quick look over 2014.  But... I've had a bit of wine, and some sorbet cocktail, and some asti so I might need some help.  Also, apologies in advance for any typos, rambling and general mishaps that typically occur when typing in an inebriated fashion).  Here goes.

"Sam, what have we done this year?"

"...lots?"

Ooft. Thanks, nevermind.  Okay, from memory... (so definitely not in any kind of order)

Berlin.  Currywurst was great. Walking tour was knackering, but good.

Barcelona.  Even better than Berlin.  Lots of food, lots of Sangria.

Took a road trip to Scotland - went for a burrito on the way (woop!), got to see my family in Aberdeen, took a scenic route through the Cairngorms and had a t'riffic night in Edinburgh.

Latitude festival.  Highlights included watching Damon Albarn (and the better half of Blur) in an incredible thunderstorm, and getting to see Hozier live (eeeeee!!!).

I went to Brighton for the first and second times in my life, and found a youthful, vibrant city full of character and shops (and burgers covered in pulled pork).

I also got to be Maid of Honour for one of my best friends - first throwing her a nautical-but-nice hen do in Ipswich, then attending her big day and watching her tie the knot in a beautiful ceremony in Cambridge.

Admittedly, it's not just been a year of peaks and successes. There have crappy moments romantically, financially and professionally, but without them I wouldn't have been able to appreciate the fortune that I have had (sorry, cheese incoming).  I have some amazing and supportive friends and family, I've been living fairly independently for over a year and the future is looking very, very bright.  Yes, in six months time everything will be totally different.  I'm moving house very soon.  I'll be getting rid of a lot of shoes.  I'm going to be embarking on a new career path.  These things are definitely terrifying, but also... full of potential.  Last year all I asked was to schedule in some "me" time, spend some weekends in Europe and get back into running (2/3 ain't bad, right?)  So all in all I think I'm due a bit of a shake up - bring it on 2015, I'm ready for ya.

I wish everyone reading this (and some people that aren't) very happy new years.  May you triumphantly overcome the obstacles thrown at you, and be rewarded with all the love and happiness you deserve. Now piss off and get drunk(er) xxxxx

Byron, oh Byron

Okay, so it's been a while since I posted anything at all, and while I'd like to jazz life up by typing something clever and/or thought provoking, a girl's gotta eat.  So I've eaten, and thought I would share.  (My experience.  Not my food.)

For those of you who haven't noticed, Byron outlets have been popping up all over the place - most notably in London but also in a few other hotspots, from Leeds all the way down to Kent.  Each restaurant (though I've only been to er, four so far) has a slightly different vibe, but they share a kind of rugged, eclectic, retro feel, often encapsulated in quirky counters, naked brickwork and fantastic wallpaper.

Byron do burgers. Wonderful burgers.  Burgers with delicious, perfectly-cooked beef and real, fresh toppings, encased in the perfect burger bun.  There's nothing frivolous or elaborate on the plate when you get it - they don't even come with sides - but that's fine, because there's no point putting lipstick on a pig (or piece of cow) when that pig is beautiful, perfectly-proportioned and gosh-darned delicious just the way it is.  This works both ways; the sides at Byron aren't just for cosmetic value - the skinny fries are a perfect partner if you need your potato complement, and the onion rings might be the finest onion rings I've ever had the pleasure of devouring.  Yes, you might initially feel a bit ripped off at the thought of only getting a burger - but you wanted a burger, right?  Otherwise you wouldn't be here.  The portions are actually just right for you to have a meaty bun to yourself and still share a side with your dining-partner - you altruistic thing, you!

Never feel like a cheapskate again;
"we'll just have the er, 'good white' please"

As ever, the service aspect is just as important as the food itself (in my opinion, anyway), and Byron's staff are consistently good.  No matter what time of day, or how busy the restaurant has been when I've walked in, the team have pitched it just right.  They're warm, efficient and seem genuinely interested in ensuring you enjoy your meal.  Never hovering, never annoying, never false.  It's rare to find a chain that can offer this kind of consistency, so Byron; I metaphorically salute you.

Okay, so this one's actually pulled pork.
I'll snag a photo of the beef next time.

There's not a lot else to say - all Byron does is everything it should; great burgers and a flawless service in a relaxed but tasteful atmosphere.  Having eaten there a bunch of times and been repeatedly impressed, it's one of the few places I would go back to with 100% confidence.  I know there are others out there that could satisfy my needs, and while I'm at this learning curve in my life there's no doubt I'll experiment elsewhere - maybe with some MeatLiquor or even Five Guys - but I'm not sure I'll ever want to really move on from Byron - my first "proper burger" love.

Last things to mention:

• look out for Byron at festivals - my first taste was a messy but delicious delight from a retro-style trailer with a giant cow on the top at Bestival in 2012
• A bonus feature in each restaurant is a number of miniature cows, hidden away in corners and on light fittings - easily missed - watching you eat their delicious comrades.
• check out the specials - often topical (this month's is the "Ronaldo") they're usually something a bit off-beat and only available for a limited time

Yes, the main course was perfectly filling.
No, we didn't regret ordering the brownie.